What is the use of dating multiple times?
Of course, there are benefits. Dating multiple times can dispel the charm of the opposite sex and the sacred charm of love. It is not only the physical charm of the opposite sex, but also the charm of the opposite sex role in terms of sociology.
What does dating mean? It means two people entering each other's world and getting to know the real side of each other in an intimate relationship.
At the beginning, everyone's understanding of dating only exists in scripts of movies, novels, stories, or in the relationships of others in social media. Everyone would think that dating is like this, full of romanticism, making people fantasize and feel very sweet, even intense emotions. However, when starting a relationship, imitating that dating script, trying out the sense of ceremony and romance displayed in social media, when the novelty wears off, the two people's worlds merge more closely, and their perspectives finally return to the real person in front of them and each other's lives. Slowly, they discover that the other person is just an ordinary person, and that sense of mystery disappears. Then they discover that there are often communication problems between them, why the other person always avoids issues, why the other person is unwilling to express their needs, why the other person doesn't understand them, why there are such big differences in personalities that conflicts often occur in daily life, why there are such big differences in understanding of a certain matter, why they or the other person are always dissatisfied.
After accumulating a lot of emotions and being unable to communicate with each other, they eventually break up.
Some people may think that they will never believe in love again. But there is one question, do you really understand what love is? Is the love you think of really what you imagine it to be?
And when you want to date, try to approach and pursue the opposite sex, and encounter obstacles and continue to encounter obstacles. You love and cannot obtain, feeling miserable, immersed in your own world like a "licking dog" when you are sad.
You finally understand that the love stories in your mind, in movies, TV shows, and novels, are not what they seem. It's not about being good to the other person, having the other person in your eyes all the time, checking in every day, delivering milk tea every day, being available at their beck and call, expressing genuine feelings, or even giving expensive gifts, being loyal and persistently pursuing them for one or two years, and then the other person will like you. On the contrary, the other person and another person of the opposite sex, they got together after knowing each other for less than a week.
Your worldview collapses, what's going on? Why is it like this?
You realize that the opposite sex has desires, the opposite sex has needs, the opposite sex looks at appearances, the opposite sex looks at physique, the opposite sex looks at feelings, the opposite sex looks at economic capabilities.
You finally understand that the essence of male-female relationships is value exchange, and these three values include emotional value, material value, and reproductive value. When your value is not recognized by the other person, your genuine feelings and efforts have no meaning.
Only then do you realize that value exchange is the process of attraction, so you need to improve your own value, build yourself, and package your own persona.
When you arm yourself with those three values, become popular in social interactions, and have many opposite-sex individuals actively greet you, you may even feel overwhelmed. You come into contact with the first attractive opposite-sex partner, but eventually break up because they are too clingy and difficult to deal with. You come into contact with the second fashionable opposite-sex partner, they are not clingy to you, but they often socialize with the opposite sex, and you cannot effectively communicate, so you break up. You come into contact with the third refined opposite-sex partner, and you invest a lot of material resources for a refined lifestyle. However, the other person feels that you lack ambition, and you feel that the other person doesn't understand you, so you break up. You come into contact with the fourth opposite-sex partner, at this time you are busy with your business, but the other person feels that you lack care and you are overwhelmed, so you eventually break up.
Then you come into contact with the fifth opposite-sex partner, you appreciate each other, are independent, interact and give feedback to each other, and neither of you takes each other for granted, but instead gives. You actively communicate and solve problems. You respect each other and give each other personal space. You no longer demand that the other person fulfill your expectations, but instead help each other grow. Eventually, you move towards marriage.
Some people repeat the same problems in their nth partner, some people constantly update their partners but don't know how to love, and some people remain single without a partner.